VR BOXPORN

Virtual Reality BOXPORN

Tonight Jochen has sex with Mia Bangg. Actually, Jochen has been with Frauke for four years. But Frauke is already asleep. And Mia Bangg never sleeps. Jochen wished Frauke a good night and said he still had to check some mails. Frauke didnt know if that was true. She only knew that it wasnt always true. If Jochen claims to be on Facebook, he can surf youporn.com just as well. But Frauke doesnt want to know exactly. Who wants to know that your partner has a lot of cybersex at the moment and is in the next room with Internet porn. Each third Download and each fourth search inquiry in the net concerns Pornografie. 30 percent of the worlds data stream consists of pornographic material. The porn sites of the Manwin Group alone, one of the largest international porn providers, have 16 billion page views per month. By comparison, the online encyclopedia Wikipedia receives just six billion hits a month. One might think that pornography is the real reason for the existence of the Internet. If we bill our completely unsuspicious mothers and primary school children, statistically there is hardly anyone left who does not enjoy naked meat virtually. Because two thirds of porn users keep their pleasure secret, but 70 percent of men watch pornos, the probability that their own partner clicks is far greater than that of not doing so. Who lives in 2013 in a firm partnership must ask himself whether and how he can accept an erotic parallel world in his love relationship. And how the porn world influences our sexuality. Pornography, the explicit representation of sexual acts, can already be found on cave drawings and Greek vases. And until the 1990s, a stack of Danish porn magazines was hidden under Papas coin collection. PorNO - the rejection of pornography as a depiction contemptuous of women - was a theme that Alice Schwarzer was committed to, but most ignored. Apparently liberal, the Germans renounced an opinion. Why should they? Only a few poor drops of porn had to do with pornography, sneaking into the station cinema with their heads down. The dirty cinemas are history. Today we know about the omnipresence of pornography. And then to be shocked when the porn stars of our partners iPad pant towards us. To find a porn collection on the hard disk of your loved one has become one of the classics of couple life. The standard explanation is then: This has nothing to do with us, honey, Im just doing it for relaxation. But is that the whole truth?

What is admired in VR pornography, not everyone wants to have at home

If you follow sex therapists like Esther Perel, pornography has basically little to do with real sex on the spring mattress. The erotic fantasy world exists independently of real physical love, as a separate area of human sexuality. Basically, if you are a permanent guest on the Sado pages, you dont want to bend your wifes hair. The Porno-Net is only the backdrop for a part of his self with which he knows little about reality. And even masturbation is not the emergency solution it is often presented as. Masturbation is largely independent of how satisfying and frequent partner sex is. The well-known American love researcher Helen Fisher even sees porn consumption as a good way of unleashing hormones in partnerships. Porn leads to more dopamine, more testosterone and more pleasure. And the American sex therapist Joe Kort has made the experience that the preferred pornographic fantasies can reveal important life themes that can grow a relationship. But only if they are openly negotiated by the couple. A few years ago this was still the truth. And pornography was part of our sexual fantasies. But conditions have reversed. Our fantasy has long since become a part of pornography. The gigantic porn industry, which in the USA alone produces a new porn every 40 minutes and has an estimated annual turnover of 100 billion dollars, now has us firmly under control. Brazilian waxing, which has become as familiar to us as caries prophylaxis, is a product of the porn industry - the pubic hair obstructs the cameras view. Today half the world wears the hairless look. We also owe the fact that every drugstore now has anal sex lubricants in its range to the porn industry. In porn, anal intercourse is an everyday act like emptying the dishwasher. And even if only about 20 percent of women in Germany practice anal intercourse - the pressure is growing. For heavy porn consumers, genital penetration is no longer exciting enough. If your wife doesnt participate, the gap between illusion and reality is closed by pornography itself. But shouldnt an enlightened, loving partner simply tolerate the vice of her lover as an annoying time phenomenon? After all, everyone in a partnership has the right to their own personal space and secrets. Or is it too much to ask to respect and feel respected by a man who obviously doesnt find anything better than watching horny guys moaning women ejaculate into their faces? The fact that the cocktail of Internet and pornography is not harmless is shown by the 8 to 15 percent of porn fans who become addicted. The hunt for pixeled sex determines the lives of the addicts, whose hard disks are sometimes filled with 25,000 images. Internet sex addiction is a non-substance-bound behavioral addiction that increasingly dominates the sick person, emotionally exhausts him and ultimately can economically ruin him. Pornography changes our brain in an unpleasant way. Porn consumption also leads to more and more porn consumption among consumers who are not yet addicted. To consumption of ever more extreme pornography. And to a desensitization, which in real sexuality leads to erection problems, delayed orgasms and sinking desire for the partner. When masturbating to pornographic films, a large amount of dopamine is briefly released in the male brain, which lifts the mood of men for one or two hours and improves their general condition.

Porn can reduce the desire for orgasm proximity

This effect is based on the same neuronal circuit that is also activated by gambling or the use of cocaine, US feminist Naomi Wolf sums it up in her new book Vagina. The reward triggered by ones own porn orgasms is sought again and again. But because he gets used to it at the same time, the porn junkie goes on a hunt for kicks that turn him on even more, for the ideal images. Some pictures are very disappointing, but others are exciting and surprising. The hunt continues, describes the American psychologist and relationship expert Prof. John Gottman. The porn consumer thus undergoes a conditioning process which is very difficult to erase again. And because ever stronger stimuli are sought, the porn lover almost inevitably ends up in a world of images in which sex is accompanied by violence, humiliation and abuse. The well-known US author and cultural critic Michael Ventura writes: There is no such thing as insignificant sex. What you mean by insignificant sex is having sex and switching off those parts of yourself that can empathize. But the price you pay when you often behave like that is anything but insignificant. The price we pay when we have seemingly insignificant Internet porn sex is the imprint on a deeply impersonal, ultimately devaluing sexuality. A sexual encounter opens the senses, is devotion, giving up, letting go. The lustful sensation extends to every cell, the lust becomes the encounter. Porn consumption, on the other hand, is the reduction of sensuality to orgasm proximity, the fixation on efficient build-up of tension. Our brain is a learning machine that cannot not learn. We train and program it through every perception. Our brain cells are cordially indifferent to whether something is experienced real or virtual. We cry in the cinema as we do at a funeral service, and skiers train a slalom course mentally until their bodies have mastered the piste. No one can be indifferent to the constant consumption of male-dominated pornosexuality. So far, women only seem to be worried about losing their sexual attractiveness completely in competition with gigantic breasts and cellulite-free thighs. More seriously, pornography lacks any intimacy. Intimacy is difficult to portray. Even in demanding movies there are hardly any scenes of sexual intimacy. But in pornography the renunciation of the emotional world is wanted. The reduction to pure, stubborn sex is what makes pornography so attractive. And it is their biggest curse. Pornography is threatening for our partnerships because closeness and intimacy between partners become even more difficult. Fears of attachment drive lovers apart anyway, and men in particular mutate into intimacy fugitives, who then find a safe haven in www.porn for comfortable wish fulfillment. In the porn wonderland of eternally willing women, they dont have to fear rejection or failure, they dont have to deal with their own fear of being dominated.

You can have exactly what you want in virtual reality

You dont have to argue at all. Porn sex is, of course, simpler sexuality. So far, there is only one female for every three male sex clicks. According to studies, however, women are just as excited by porn as men. But scientists have found that in most cases women do not admit that they enjoy picture-quickie. Not yet. As soon as they do, pornography will influence our partnerships even more. Anyone who is 14 years old today is increasingly experiencing early sexual education on the Internet anyway. Young people experience pornography before any real erotic experience. They are shaped by unattainable aesthetic norms regarding bosom, bottom and sexual organs, and enter the realm of real sexuality full of unreal performance fears in the face of pornographic sex acrobatics. And because pornography is the answer to themselves, they have entered an illusionary world that is very difficult to leave. The Porno-Net is a supermarket. And as in any supermarket, the message is: You can have exactly what you want. The couple and Sexualtherapeutin Professor Dr. Gerti Senger writes in addition: The seduction power of the Cybersex is large: The own desire is mirrored, one concentrates without consideration of the needs of a Gegenüberschen on its preferential attraction, senses unconscious desires, feels safe, uninhibited, powerfully and arrives comfortably and immediately at the desired satisfaction. Who still wants to struggle laboriously with the partner for the dwindling desire? Pornography is not our personal fantasy, into which we can dive without it touching our real sexuality, but a brainwashing. The endless stereotypical repetition of the eternally same sexual dramaturgy. The porn www wonderland satisfies fewer needs than it creates. Permanent erections and blowjobs reminiscent of sword swallowing artistry inevitably set new standards. Norms arouse fears of not satisfying them. Fears lead to behavioural rigidity. Rigid behaviour leads to conflicts. Conflicts are unpleasant, we want to avoid them. One click and we can avoid them. Pornography itself is neither bad nor good. But since the beginning of the Internet it has begun to determine our sexuality. Listlessness is today the most common sexual problem in partnerships. The tender sexuality of closeness and connection that is necessary for a lasting partner sexuality is difficult to realize for many couples. Couple therapists then suspect unresolved partnership conflicts. But the first question for ten years now has to be: What about your pornography consumption? Because as soon as Mia gets into the pillows, intimate partnerships become even more difficult. The passionate sexuality of the infatuation phase can still put Mia in her virtual shoes. But at some point in every partnership we face the task of realizing our desire, which is always experienced as infinite, in a limited reality. Thanks to Mia, we have begun to fail a little more every day.




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